The Alcoholic and Feelings of Inferiority

“Just 10 years ago my own mother, after years of bewilderment, lost hope. Long a chronic problem drinker, I had come to the jumping-off place. A very good doctor had pronounced the grim sentence; “obsessive drinker, deteriorating rapidly – hopeless. “The doctor used to talk about my case somewhat like this: “yes, Bill has underlying personality defects…great emotional sensitivity, childishness, and inferiority.”  This very real feeling of inferiority is magnified by his childish sensitivity and it is this state of affairs which generate in him that insatiable, abnormal craving for self – approval and success in the eyes of the world. Still a child he cries for the moon….discovering alcohol, he found much more in it than normal folks. To him alcohol is no mere relaxation; it means release-release from inner conflict….As one who knows me a little, you may have heard how, ten years ago, a friend, himself a liberated alcoholic, came to me bearing the light which finally let me out of the toils. There will come a day like that for you and yours.” – Pg.101-102 from The Language of the Heart


If you have battled alcoholism then you can probably relate to the above writing. Most of us do indeed experience the childishness, sensitivity, inferiority, and we definitely can identify with finding much more in alcohol than others do. It is a release for us. With that being said prior to receiving alcohol addiction help booze was also our prison. We could not stop ourselves. As you can tell Bill W. struggled with this disease, and felt just as hopeless as we do before getting sober. Just like bill we can recover too. With the help of a drug addiction detox, AA, and/or a 30 day rehab program we all have the opportunity to be released from our toils. We can overcome this disease and go on to live the kind of happy, joyous, and free life we were meant to.

Choosing An AA Sponsor

When entering 12 step recovery programs, new members are advised to choose a sponsor with experience working the recovery steps. To ensure proper support and guidance throughout recovery, this individual MUST hold a belief in the 12 steps, while exuding a unique combination of strength, love and honesty. In this entry, we will offer a few tips to help you locate your ideal AA sponsor.

1 – Choosing someone who possesses experience, and who is currently involved in the program is vital to ensuring a positive and productive AA experience. Finding someone who is kind and thoughtful can be relatively easy at a 12 step meeting. But if this person does not possess the right types of qualities, you may not be able to enjoy the type of recovery you require.

2 – Do they walk the walk? When choosing a sponsor, it is important to select someone who practices what they preach. Once you’ve found a candidate, take some time to observe their actions and behaviors to determine whether they are a good fit.

3 – It may sound silly, but choosing a sponsor of the same gender will be extremely beneficial to your AA experience. In many cases, men are better able to understand the driving forces behind addiction in other men. The same can be said for women. Choosing a same gender sponsor can also help you avoid potential emotional issues that may surface with mixed gender sponsee / sponsor pairings. The idea here is to remove any potential distractions that may interfere with your recovery.

4 – Do not “sponsor jump”. During your initial recovery, you may find your sponsor saying things that you do not necessarily agree with or want to hear at the time. Honesty is a valuable and vital aspect of the recovery process. Jumping from one sponsor to the next simply because someone has been a little blunt does not serve your recovery at all. Conversely, it will likely hinder it. Platitudes may serve your ego, but will do little to aid your sobriety.

5 – Grab yourself a copy of the AA Big Book. Think of it as the AA bible, if you will. In this text you will find numerous accounts from people just like you, who have worked and successfully utilized the first step of the program. Additional stories, including those from members with much more program experience, are documented in detail.

Questions Anyone?

If you have additional questions regarding the 12 steps or rehabilitation, our Above It All addiction specialists are available to help. Give us a call, and let us help you get back on track towards the happy, healthy, and fulfilling lifestyle you so rightfully deserve.