Working With Another Alcoholic

“If you are satisfied that he is a real alcoholic, begin to dwell on the hopeless feature of the malady. Show him, from your own experience, how the queer mental condition surrounding that first drink prevents normal functioning of the will power. Don’t, at this stage, refer to this book, unless he has seen it and wishes to discuss it. And be careful not to brand him as an alcoholic. Let him draw his own conclusion. If he sticks to the idea that he can still control his drinking, tell him that possibly he can- if he is not too alcoholic. But insist that if he is severely afflicted, there may be little chance he can recover by himself. Continue to speak of alcoholism as an illness, a fatal malady. Talk about the conditions of body and mind which accompany it.” – Pg.92 Working With Others, from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

When talking to people about this disease and the potential need for alcohol addiction help it is important that we don’t preach or recite lines from the big book. Instead we can share our experience, strength, and hope and talk about their options as far as a drug addiction detox, AA, 30 day rehab program, and other treatment options are concerned. We are there to be of service not to try and convince the person that they are an alcoholic and need help. It is also imperative that we do not diagnose others for it is necessary that we come to that conclusion on our own. Within this realization come enough pain, desperation, surrender, and willingness to get us to do the work needed to get and stay sober. It is only when we are standing at that turning point in our lives that we have a fighting chance at recovery. It is a life full of promise, hope, and joy and we would not want to rob anyone of this journey.

Being Free of Anger and Resentment in Sobriety

“If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics these things are poison. We turned back to the list for it held the key to the future. We prepared to look for it from an entirely different angle. We began to see that the world and its people really dominated us. In that state, the wrong-doing of others, fancied or real, had power to actually kill. How could we escape? We saw that these resentments must be mastered, but how? We could not wish them away say more than alcohol. This was our course: We realized that the people who wronged us were perhaps spiritually sick. Though we did not like their symptoms and the way these disturbed us, they, like ourselves, were sick too.”- pg. 66- 67 How It Works from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

We hear time and time again that resentment is the number one offender. It takes more alcoholics out and keeps more alcoholics from seeking alcohol addiction help than anything else. If we are to live a happy, joyous, and free life we must learn to rid ourselves of our resentments and let go. In a 30 day rehab program, AA, drug addiction detox, or sober livings we learn how to turn everything over to a power greater than ourselves, as well as forgive. It is important that we are able to forgive ourselves and others for the wrongs done to us or that we have done. Forgiveness happens when we let go of the hope that we can change the past. If we are able to stay in the moment most of the time then we will have an easier time dealing with ourselves and others because when we are living in the present we are able to have enough clarity to see that while we may not always get what we want or at least what we think we want we always get what we need.

Discovering a Power Greater than Yourself in Sobriety

“Well, that’s exactly what this book is about. Its main objective is to enable you to find a power greater than yourself which will solve your problem. That means we have written a book which we believe to be spiritual as well as moral. And it means, of course that we are going to talk about God. Here difficulty arises with agnostics.  Many times we talk to a new man and watch his hope rise as we discuss his alcoholic problems and explain our fellowship. But his face falls when we speak of spiritual matters, especially when we mention God, for we have re-opened a subject which our man thought he had nearly evaded or entirely ignored. We know how he feels. We have shared his honest doubt and prejudice. Some of us have been violently anti-religious.”-pg. 45 We Agnostics from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

It is common for many alcoholics to have issues with the whole God thing especially because of what most of us had to endure prior to receiving alcohol addiction help, as well as the type of religious upbringing most of us had. When we get to the part of the big book that states “either God is everything or he is nothing what is our choice to be?” it can be difficult for us to make that decision. It might seem like enough to have to deal with getting sober, going to a 30 day rehab program, AA, or a drug addiction detox but the fact is that if those things aren’t backed up with spiritual growth followed by a spiritual experience then it is all for nothing. It is not required that we believe in God or a guy in the sky idea but rather that we come up with a concept of a power greater than ourselves that works for us. What this “power” looks like acts like, is called, resides, and any other qualities are entirely up to us as the individual.

The Alcoholic, Fear, and Sobriety

“Sometimes we think fear ought to be classed with stealing. It seems to cause more trouble. We reviewed our fears thoroughly. We put them on paper, even though we had no resentment in connection with them. We asked ourselves why we had them. Wasn’t it because self-reliance failed us? Self-reliance was good as far as it went, but it didn’t go far enough. Some of us once had great self-confidence, but it didn’t fully solve the fear problem, or any other. When it made us cocky, it was worse. Perhaps there is a better way-we think so.For we are now on different basis of trusting and relying upon God. We trust infinite God rather than our finite self. We are in the world to play the role he assigns. Just to the extent that we do as we think he would have us, and humbly rely on him, does he enable us to match calamity with serenity.” – Pg.68 How It Works, from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

Fear often robs us of all things good in our life. It causes so much damage and can be paralyzing at times. When we first receive alcohol addiction help, go to a drug addiction detox, AA, or 30 day rehab program one of the first things that is asked of us is to turn our will over to a power greater than ourselves. Through the recovery process we are given the tools needed to do so. The fact is that at some point we come to realize that fear to the extent that most of us endure it is not healthy and is no longer a character defect that works for us. It is isolating and only separates us from the world but also from our higher power. If we are in so much fear that we feel like we have to control the situation regardless of the fact that we are powerless then there is very little to no room for God. If we can live in faith then we can be rid of fear, be happy, be free from the bondage of self, and truly know what it’s like to live in the sunlight of the spirit while we match calamity with serenity.

Detox That Works In Surroundings That Comfort

At Above It All Treatment and Recovery Center, we have a dedicated detox facility situated on Lake Arrowhead in the San Bernardino Mountains that’s managed by a highly trained staff to make your experience as comfortable and as smooth as possible. Upon arrival, we will fully assess your physical and chemical state. Before we begin your treatment, we will evaluate any injuries you have and perform comprehensive tests to gain an in-depth look at the biochemical, nutritional, and neuro-biological aspects of your addiction.

Detox can be dangerous if not done properly. Many people who attempt detox, either by themselves or under the supervision of someone who is insufficiently trained, fail and relapse because of the painful and unpleasant symptoms they experience when undergoing detox. That’s why it’s critical to work with experienced professionals who will supervise the process from start to finish, and make you feel as comfortable as possible.

With a staff of licensed nurses providing 24-hour care, 7 days a week, you can rest easy knowing that your comfort, safety and ongoing needs are our number one priority. No one slips through the cracks or goes unnoticed here. We have the highest staff-to-client ratio of any drug treatment facility in the country, and we pride ourselves on taking excellent care of our clients. Privacy, confidentiality, and the highest level of care are what you can expect at Above It All Treatment and Recovery Center.

When you call Above It All Treatment and Recovery Center, we will discuss your specific needs for any drug or alcohol detox services. Then, upon admission, we will determine what your detox protocol will be.  If you are interested in learning more, please call for a FREE addiction assessment now:  888-634-4546

Discovering Our Higher Power in Sobriety

“In the preceding chapters you have learned something of alcoholism. We hope we have made clear the distinction between the alcoholic and the non-alcoholic. If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic, if that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer. To one who feels he is an atheist or agnostic such an experience seems impossible, but to continue as he is means disaster, especially if he is an alcoholic of the hopeless variety. To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face. – pg. 44 We Agnostics, from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous 

After first receiving alcohol addiction help one of the first few things that come up for us is the god issue. We might have issues with identifying, and believing in God especially if the god we grew up with was a source of punishment and damnation. The fact is that all we have to do is have the willingness to come up with a concept of a higher power that we believe can handle any aspect of our lives. When we are doing the work whether it be in a drug addiction detox, AA, or 30 day rehab program we can hopefully begin to see how our higher power had been doing for us what we could not do for ourselves this whole time. After we establish a conscious contact with a power greater then ourselves it is then and only then that we can go on to have a spiritual experience begin to truly heal.

The Alcoholic Double Life

“More than most people, the alcoholic leads a double life. He is very much the actor. To the outer world he presents his stage character. This is the one he likes his fellows to see. He wants to enjoy a certain reputation, but knows in his heart he doesn’t deserve it. The inconsistency is made worse by the things he does on his sprees. Coming to his sense, he is revolted at certain episodes he vaguely remembers. These memories are a nightmare. He trembles to think someone might have observed him. As far as he can, he pushes these memories far inside himself. He hopes they will never see the light of day. He is under constant fear and tension.”-pg. 73 Into Action from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

As alcoholics we are very good at living a double life. While we might be dying on the inside, and spiritually bankrupt it doesn’t matter as long as everyone around us thinks we are doing well, and have it together. This doesn’t always change after receiving alcohol addiction help especially in the beginning. It’s as if we have an alter ego. It stops us from letting people in. Its that part in us which drives us to gain acceptance and be the favorite and before we know it we are constantly striving for perfection and always coming up short. Weather its wanting to be the favorite student, partner, child, or friend it becomes our mission to show everyone how “okay” we are when we know we are dying on the inside. It plays out in many ways. We end up compartmentalizing our relationships and often times feel overwhelmed when we can’t keep it together and we start coming unglued. This pressure that we continuously put on ourselves to be a chameleon and do things perfectly is torturous. When we get into a 30 day rehab program, AA, or drug addiction detox we can begin to work on this issue and finally experience freedom from the bondage of self. We know longer have to be a slave to our ideas of what our life as well as personal relationships should look like. As it says in the big book “we will begin to know a new freedom and a new happiness, we will comprehend the word serenity, and we will know peace.”

Sobriety and Working With Others

“Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as much as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill…perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover. You can easily find some by asking a few doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals, they will be only too glad to assist you .Don’t start out as an evangelist or reformer. Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much from them, if you wish, but it happens that because of your own drinking experience you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. So cooperate, never criticize. To be helpful is our only aim.”-pg. 89 Working With Others from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous.

As alcoholics we have the amazing opportunity to be of service to other alcoholics that are seeking out alcohol addiction help. Since we have been through the same struggles and came out the other side we are more able then most people to be of maximum service. It is important that we don’t preach but rather lead by example. Weather we are being of service at a drug addiction detox, meeting, 30 day rehab program, hospitals, institutions, or one on one our best bet when it comes to reaching a fellow alcoholic is by listening and sharing your experience, strength and hope. This way of life is based on attraction rather than promotion. We need not sell sobriety to others. If someone wants to get sober nothing we say can stop them from trying or make them want it more. Our only responsibility is to be there when someone reaches out for help and needs us to show them the way.

Finding the Fun in Sobriety

“We have shown you how we have gotten out from under. “Yes, I’m willing. But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring, and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute? Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in alcoholics anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom, and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you. “How is that to come about?” you ask. “Where am I to find these people?” you are going to meet these new friends in your own community. Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship.-pg. 152 A Vision for You from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

Many people that have just received alcohol addiction help or have a desire to get sober have the same concerns such as becoming boring, miserable, and unsuccessful at life. It can be hard for many of us to believe that there is a life of joy, happiness, and freedom just around the corner. It is also hard to see how we could possibly get the life back that we destroyed, and have fun again. If we are in a 30 day rehab program, AA or a drug addiction detox we may feel stuck. We may think to ourselves that this is as good as it gets. It’s not. As alcoholics we knew how to party, often times we were the life of the party, and that definitely doesn’t change in sobriety. We get to have a blast and there is something for everyone. If we just work for it we can find the joy and happiness we have been longing for.

Getting Sober and Repairing the Family

“We alcoholics are sensitive people. At the beginning of recovery a man will take, as a rule, one of two directions. He may either plunge into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks or thinks of little else….since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show unselfishness and love under his own roof. We know there are difficult wives and families, but the man who is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much to make them so.” – Pg.125-127 in The Family Afterward from the big book of Alcoholics Anonymous

When we first receive alcohol addiction help and get sober we are usually so filled with relief and joy. Many of us are on what is referred to as a “pink cloud”. This is where everything just seems so great and amazing. It’s as if we had been dead inside for so long and were just reborn. Often times when we are in this state many of us want to experience everything, just enjoy it, and have fun which is okay as long as we are doing the work as well as repairing our relationships with others especially family. When the big book talks about how our home has suffered more than anything else it is referring to the damage we caused in our families lives .For most of us our loved ones were the ones that were there and witnessed us at our worst. While it may take a while the chances of familial reparation is high and likely for most of us. It is one of the gifts of sobriety .perhaps not at first but in time they will be able to see the dedication to sobriety and will most likely be thrilled, and supportive. With that being said If  we fail to mend our relationship with them and put time and effort into those relationships they will most likely continue to be resentful since not only were they losing their loved ones to this disease but they will probably go on to feel like they also lost them to recovery as well.Therefore its imperative that we do what we need to do to get sober, Go to a drug addiction detox, AA, or 30 day rehab program, and then do the best we can to be a better daughter,son,mother,father,and sibling .We owe it to them and to ourselves.