The Alcoholic and the First Step – Part Two

“Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:

  1. … that our lives had become unmanageable.”  The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 59

Lets look at the other half of the First Step, “…that our lives had become unmanageable.”  What, exactly, is that unmanageability to which that line refers?  We can look at all the external aspects of our lives and nothing seems to be going right, everything’s askew, from finances to relationships to employment, etc.  Maybe, as we are at this alcohol and drug rehabilitation center in Los Angeles, it seems obvious that everything we have touched or are/have been involved with/in is less than manageable.  That may be, in and of itself, more than enough of a description and proof of our inability to handle anything in our lives.

With that said, the unmanageability that plainly shows itself in the day-to-day of our existence is no match for the unmanageability that is churning and roiling within us.  The drive to numb ourselves because of how we feel about the things we may have or have not done comes from the place of being so unsettled in the very core of our being.  That is true unmanageability; everything else outside of us is simply a vague reflection of where we are internally.

Coupled together with the first half of the First Step, it sums up our torturous misery and insanity regarding alcohol and/or drugs.  Fear not, the staff can help guide you into truly understanding this.  In assisting us toward our necessary and thorough First Step experience, it allows us the opportunity to move forward, out of our prison built on alcohol and drugs.  It no longer causes us to reside in that empty yet sick feeling in the place of our soul which leads us back again and again, no matter how much of our lives or the lives of those around us have disintegrated into sorrow and poverty, be it of the financial and/or spiritual kind.  There is a way out of that cycle however we must be open to learning new actions and the true meaning of the words by which we begin our new lives.

The Addict Alcoholic and the First Part of Step One

“Here are the steps we took, which are suggested as a program of recovery:

  1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol… ”  The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 59

There are moments when we can look at our lives, and there’s no question to us that everything seems completely and utterly amiss.    It’s easy to think, “Of course my life is unmanageable; here I am in a California rehab for alcohol and drugs.  It doesn’t get much more unmanageable than that.”   What might be missing in this thought process is the understanding of the first half of the First Step.  If we take a moment to really read the Step, it’s broken up into two distinct parts, both requiring a complete understanding and subsequently an experience beyond words solidifying their respective definitions.

“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol…”  What does that really mean?  Alcohol and drugs became our master and insidiously insured that we would do whatever we could, whenever we could, however we could have those items to imbibe at any cost.  Perhaps there were times when we wanted to stop drinking and/or taking drugs but no matter how hard we tried to marshal our very will to not to smoke that pipe or pop that pill or stick the needle in our veins or drink that fifth, we could not stop.  What’s more powerless than being sucked back into taking actions we don’t want to take and yet continuing them as if there is no tomorrow?  Where, suddenly, as life is taking a turn for the better, or for the worse, or having very little change at all, we find ourselves drinking and/or drugging with complete abandon, all the while thinking, “I want to stop.  Please help me stop.” and we simply just cannot.

This is a sense of Powerlessness that surpasses anything tangible.  It is a deep set, intrinsic understanding that reinforces the concept and feeling that there is nothing, absolutely NOTHING, we can do to control this.  In effect, we are at its full mercy, beholden to its wicked, strangling grasp.  An essence of Powerlessness that surpasses anything we could have ever imagined.

The Alcoholic Addict and Being of Service

“Our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God and the people about us.” – The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 77

What does that mean?  How can we be “of maximum service”?

When we embark on our new boulevard of sobriety, we may feel lost and confused.  Our proverbial, internal GPS may not have a way to register the new direction in which we are traveling.

What do we do?  Where do we go?  What’s our purpose?  Our instructions for living a sober, healthy, productive life is summed up in that very sentence on page 77.  Our purpose is to ask how and then subsequently serve all instead of expecting the world and the people in it to serve us.

Serving others can be as simple as smiling at a stranger and being patient in line at the bank.  The way we treat people, whether we feel like being nice or not, is one of the ways that we are of service.  Our moment of being kind can assist in completely shifting someone’s day, just as our being rude can affect a person’s outlook and how they then treat the people around them.

The main way we can be of service is by sponsoring and working with the newly sober as we guide them through the Twelve Steps outlined in the Program of Alcoholics Anonymous.  As we work with others, and give away what has so freely been given to us, we begin to understand the true idea of service.  As we extend our sober hand to those who may be currently downtrodden, we lift up not only the person but the entire world.

Tips for a Sober Halloween from a Los Angeles Rehab Center

California rehab centers know that one of the scariest things about Halloween is the number of drunk or drugged drivers hitting the roads this night. National Highway Traffic Safety Administration statistics show that Halloween is one of the most dangerous nights of the year for alcohol and drug-related traffic deaths. About 44 percent of all traffic deaths on Halloween occur are the direct result of intoxicated driver getting behind the wheel. Compared to other holiday periods, Halloween night has one of the highest proportions of substance-related traffic deaths, ahead of both Christmas and New Year’s Eve.

Substance abuse takes lives the entire year through, but Halloween is an especially dangerous day. For some, this Halloween may be a wake-up call, a time to seek an affordable rehab center, while others who have already found peace and joy in sobriety may find temptation in this holiday. Here are some tips to help you stay sober during the Halloween festivities:

1. If you’re not sure there will be non-alcoholic beverages available to you during the celebrations,  bring your own.

2. Avoid areas in which alcoholic drinks are being served, or people are using.

3. Stay busy! Chat, dance, keep moving. Don’t think about the fact you’re not using or drinking.

4. Be sure to eat before leaving the house, so that you’re not hungry.

5. If you feel the temptation to use drugs or alcohol is becoming too much, just make a speedy exit.

6. Chances are, there’s at least one other person at the party who is also sober. Find them and stick together!

8. Why not spend Halloween at a 12-Step meeting? Many groups plan special events for this night.

9. Keep your sponsor’s number handy, and don’t hesitate to use it.

Many people who need alcohol drug rehab, have not yet found their way into drug addiction rehab treatment. Although we empathize with them, and hope they find the help they need, that shouldn’t stop us from enjoying this festive time of year. Think of Halloweens past, spent in a drug or alcohol-induced haze; the blackouts and depression and sadness. This year, follow our tips to celebrate sober and enjoy all that the holiday has to offer.

Yes, Virginia – There Really is Affordable Drug Treatment

“I can’t get clean and sober, because I can’t find affordable drug treatment.” In many cases, those struggling with alcohol and drug addiction do not receive the help they need, because they believe they can’t afford the cost of treatment. Actually, that doesn’t have to be the case. It’s true that many of the high-profile and high-dollar rehabs centers favored by Hollywood A-listers can cost well into five-figures for a one-month stay. According to TheFix, an addiction website, one well-known Malibu clinic charges about $80,000 for a month of treatment. While that’s a number well out of reach of most average Americans, with a bit of research it is possible to find effective and affordable drug treatment.

Most large urban areas offer not-for-profit and publicly-funded treatment centers which offer low-cost, or subsidized treatment programs. For those suffering addictions not requiring medically-monitored detox, outpatient clinics can also be an affordable option. Narcotics Anonymous and Alcoholics Anonymous are  both free of charge, and meetings are held at a variety of times and locations to fit just about any schedule. For those with deeply-rooted, life-threatening addictions that require doctor-supervised detox, local hospitals can also be a good resource – especially those with health insurance coverage or Medicaid/Medicare. Some private facilities will offer payment plans or sliding scale fees to cash-strapped clients. Often, the family of the person seeking treatment will gladly contribute resources in hopes of seeing their loved one freed from the slavery of addiction.

Those seeking an affordable, effective option might consider our Los Angeles rehab. Licensed by the State of California Department of Alcohol & Drug Programs, we treat a variety of addictions and related disorders using a variety of evidenced-based treatment modalities. Our experienced licensed and credentialed staff includes LCSW, MFT, CADC and RADS Counselors, nurses, psychiatrists and physicians. We offer medically-monitored detox along with around the clock availability and support via group and individual therapy utilizing 12-Step principles and practices. Other offerings include stress and anger management counseling, relapse-prevention education and even organized outside activities many local activities such as visits to the Antique Wooden Boat Show, the Annual Art Festival and The Summer Concert Series.

High cost is no guarantee of great care. Pricey treatment centers may boast high thread-count sheets, gourmet meals and sunrise yoga classes, but they don’t necessarily yield better results. For those seeking alcohol drug rehab, the incalculable costs of continued addiction to health and relationships far outweigh the costs of treatment, regardless of price.

 

Alcoholism and Addiction as an Illness

“An illness of this sort – and we have come to believe it an illness – involves those about us in a way no other human sickness can.  If a person has cancer all are sorry for him and no on is angry or hurt.  But not so with the alcoholic illness, for with it there goes annihilation of all the things worth while in life.  It engulfs all whose lives touch the sufferer’s.” – The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 18

Many times, when we are drinking and/or using, our behavior does not inspire empathy and compassion though we are, without question, sick.  Our illness does not resemble the diseases we are aware of, the ones that allow us to feel sympathy for the one who is ill.  Our illness, the illness of alcoholism and addiction, has a tendency to inspire frustration, anger, hurt feelings and, more often that not, disappointment by anyone with whom we come in contact.  Our close friends and family, our loved ones, our partners, our children, may not feel sorry for us; they may, in fact, be angry and have had experience after experience that leaves them feeling let down once again.

So, what has to be done to treat this illness?  Essentially, it is a sickness of spirit.  What must we do to medicate our condition and invigorate our spiritual health?

This drug rehabilitation center just outside of Los Angeles, is surrounded by an abundance of beauty.  What might this have to do with our spirits you ask?  When we are immersed in sunshine, fresh air, mountains, beautiful views, sunsets and starry nights, the beauty of the world, we are given the opportunity to reconnect with nature.  In and through nature is one way to reconnect with the spirit of the world, which in turn helps us connect to the essence of our own spirits and then we are able to connect to the spirits of others.  And, it is in this last connection, the one between us and others, which is where we really begin to move away from sickness and disease and move toward living a healthy life, recovering from the illness of alcoholism and addiction.

The Alcoholic Addict and Emotion

“We want to find exactly how, when and where our natural desires have warped us.  We wish to look squarely at the unhappiness this has caused others and ourselves.  By discovering what our emotional deformities are, we can move toward their correction.  Without a willing and persistent effort to do this, there can be little sobriety or contentment for us.” – Alcoholics Anonymous’ The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, pg. 43

Warped natural desires and emotional deformities are difficult concepts to not only grasp, but to own.  We don’t want to believe there’s anything wrong with us.  Who wants to think any of us are, as the Big Book of Alcoholic Anonymous states on pg. 30, “bodily and mentally different from his fellows.”

However, truth be told, we are different.  We absorb information differently.  We assess our environments differently and many times, we are very sensitive to anything we perceive might be about ourselves, which, more often than not, is nearly every sentence and situation with which we come into contact.

This is not a viable plan for living.  If we constantly think we are the subject of every conversation and the target of every casual glance, how would that thinking not be warped and deformed?  We, as alcoholics and addicts, are, by definition, selfish creatures.  In our selfishness, our emotional capacity is stunted and our ability to grasp and process information is stilted.  We cannot adequately function in the world, much less strive within our own lives and the lives of those around us.  This is not a sturdy platform on which we stand, it is a balancing act on a house of cards on a windy day.

It is suggested we find out how, when and where we have gone astray.  It is with this knowledge that we may ask to be relieved of these burdens, this bondage of self, by whatever Power greater than ourselves to which we’ve connected.  If we do not face this information, how can we ever receive the grace that awaits us and live life in a dignified, upright, helpful fashion?   Finding these facts may seem arduous however they could very well be the key that fits the lock of a life worthwhile.

The Alcoholic and the Easier, Softer Way

“Our stories disclose in a general way what we used to be like, what happened, and what we are like now.  If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it-then you are ready to take certain steps.

At some of these we balked.  We thought we could find and easier, soft way. But we could not.” – The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 58

We, as alcoholics and addicts, may want to find a way to become sober the easy way, the least painful way; the simplest course of action to bring us to the place where we are no longer imbibing.  We’d like to traverse the path of least resistance to obtain our sobriety.  Many times this is what we want to have happen.  However, as many who have gone before us, we learn that trying to climb the hill of sobriety along a slippery slope of ease and comfort just doesn’t work.  Invariably, we fall back down to the bottom, like Sisyphus and the stone.

Some of our forebearers within the world of Recovery have made examples of themselves, albeit inadvertently, as people who attempted to take the path of least resistance and subsequently failed.  There is a return to using and/or drinking without realizing that by shirking the work, they have inevitably sacrificed their sanity and serenity, and the well being of the people around them.  The hand-waving dismissal of the opportunity for living a richer life built on Recovery is tantamount to the idea of a magic wand quickly waving away the mass destruction created when using and drinking.  It just doesn’t work like that. Our Recovery predecessors have shown us that for near-to-every attempt at sobriety that has been sought working a less than fearless and thorough program seemingly ends up back at the bottle, pouring yet another drink and wondering all the while, why didn’t it work?

With the staff at this California alcohol rehabilitation center, we begin to learn how to follow suggestions with the simplest of tasks.  If we are unable to move forward by making our beds or attending our groups, how can we expect to follow more detailed instructions later?  We must learn to adhere to the simplest suggestions first and then we can proceed further with what may seem like more taxing efforts.  If we don’t start to enact the following of suggestions now, how can we expect to have the results we see others who have followed accordingly become our results when we ourselves are unable to pursue taking on the easiest of responsibilities per another’s direction?

The Alcoholic and a Greater Power

“The fact is that most alcoholics, for reasons yet obscure, have lost the power of choice in drink.  Our so-called will power becomes practically nonexistent.  We are unable, at certain times, to bring into our consciousness with sufficient force the memory of the suffering and humiliation of even a week or a month ago.  We are without defense against the first drink.” – The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 24

This is a near-terrifying thought.  We are being told that there is no way to safeguard ourselves against the substance(s) that call to us.  The drink and/or drugs which whispers in our respective ears, beckoning us to repeat the insanity that initially brought us to this Los Angeles alcohol rehab.

What can we do to keep ourselves safe and sound?  We may read that it is beyond our power to control ourselves and that no other human power can keep us sober.  We may hope and pray that we’ll be brought to a place of sanity though we know not how.

Here is where the staff at this California alcohol rehabilitation center can direct us toward a way to tap into a Power greater than ourselves.  In using their suggestions, we may move toward this Power which can allow us to begin the building of a sturdy foundation on which our shaky legs start to learn to stand.

Connecting with this Power seems to be one of the only ways to stave off the drink and/or drug.  At any time we may suffer from a strange mental blank spot regarding the damage we’ve done while drinking and/or using.  That momentary lack of memory coupled with relying only on ourselves may immediately precede our imbibing.  In tapping into this Power greater than only ourselves, we may be given a reprieve from destruction.  It is during this reprieve where we may be able to help others and stop crushing our lives, the lives of all the people we touch, and, many times, the people with whom our people are in contact.  It is the tapping into this Power, whatever Power that is to which one connects, that may very well keep us from reaching out for that first drink.

The Alcoholic and Showing Up

“Most of us sense that a real tolerance of other people’s shortcomings and viewpoints and a respect for their opinions are attitudes which make us more useful to others.  Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs.”  The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, pg. 19 – 20

How many times have we been asked to do something for someone else?  How many times have we begged off for some vague reason, canceling out on our previous promise to show up, be it days or even hours prior to the promised event?

Many times, before we entered into this Los Angeles drug rehab, we made it a point to make plans and/or agree to activities and then we would cancel.  We fell short on our various promises to show up for a variety of people over and over again.  We couldn’t seem to find a way to follow through to be there for others.

We learn, albeit slowly, that showing up is a huge part of living a life of service and, therefore, a life of genuine purpose.  There may be times now, in our sobriety, where we are ever-so-sorry we promised to show up somewhere for something yet, our feelings aside, we appear where we say we will be.  Whether we want to or not, we still show up.  Now, it’s important, if not more than important, to let others know they can rely upon us when the chips of their lives are down and their going’s gotten rough and tough.  Our very lives depend upon us being there for their very lives.

It’s not always easy to show up.  There are times when pulling the proverbial covers up over our respective heads and hiding from the world and the people in it, seem like the far better, or, at least, much more comfortable, idea.  In doing that, we refuse to handle our responsibilities and our being available for others is sacrificed for our selfish, self-centered selves.

The staff here at this drug rehab in California will begin to lay the groundwork about how the idea of showing up, and subsequently the action of showing up, is imperative to building a solid foundation of responsibility.  In our nascent understanding of responsibility and how crucial that is to living a life of service, we then begin to learn that we must avail ourselves to others and put their needs before our wants.  When we show up, when we help another person in need, we are definitively contributing to the honeyed harmony of life and listening to that lilting melody of service as it sings softly in our ear is the sweetest & most satisfying sound ever.