What Do I Need To Be A Member of AA?

“The first edition of the book of Alcoholics Anonymous makes this brief statement about membership: “the only requirement for membership is an honest desire to stop drinking. We are not allied with any particular faith, sect, or denomination nor do we oppose anyone. We simply wish to be helpful to those who are afflicted.” This expressed our feeling as of 1939, the year our book was published. Since that day all kinds of experiments with membership have been tried…In some cases we would have been too discouraged by the demands made upon us. Most of the early members of AA would have been thrown out because they slipped too much, because their morals were too bad, because they had mental as well as alcoholic difficulties.”-pg.37 from The Language Of The Heart.

Over the next few days were going to take a look at what it means to be an alcoholic as well as some other issues surrounding this subject. Basically we are members of AA as soon as we seek alcohol addiction help and say we are. All we need is a desire to stop drinking. The word “honest” was later taken out of our statement on membership because while many of us want to stop drinking, get help at a drug addiction detox, Go to AA, go to some sort of 30 day rehab program, and make positive decisions that support our sobriety at the end of the day who has an honest desire to stop when we would still be drinking if it still worked for us? Furthermore an “honest desire” could mean so many things to so many people.so for clarity and to ensure everyone had a fair shot at achieving sobriety they took it out. Today as it stands nobody has a right to declare you alcoholic or non-alcoholic that is completely up to you to decide.

Sobriety Maintenance & Relapse Prevention

Whether you’re in recovery due to alcohol or drug addiction, the road to enjoying a sober and healthy lifestyle is one that requires a fair share of commitment and discipline. Old behaviors will often tempt you, offering the potential for relapse and the negative connotations associated with its presence. In order to lower the risk of relapse, recovering addicts must employ a variety of strategies and techniques.

The Reward System

Brushing off old habits is easier said than done, especially in cases where the long-term benefits are far from view. In an effort to keep themselves from going astray, many recovering addicts adhere to a rewards system comprised of short-term goals. Example: For each week sober, reward yourself with a trip to your favorite eating establishment.

Support

Studies suggest that roughly 90% of recovering addicts who attend weekly post-care sessions, like AA, during their first year of recovery were successfully able to avoid relapse. 12 step recovery programs such as these place individuals in touch with a community of people who share the same goals and struggles. Not only will participation in these types of organizations keep you focused and determined to succeed, but gaining a sense of community outside the bar or drug scene will work to ward off regular temptations.

Avoiding Temptation

Keep away from people, areas and items that may trigger your temptations. Example: If you are recovering from alcoholism, it’s likely a good idea to avoid bars and the acquaintances who linger around them. Rather than pretend that you’re content to simply “tag along”, try seeking out other types of activities and gatherings that support your sobriety goals. Consider this an opportunity to seek out new relationships and activities while reinventing your own self-image.

Stress Maintenance

The road to relapse is often paved with a solid helping of stress. Due to the fact that most people utilize drugs and alcohol as a stress-relief tactic, it’s crucial that recovering addicts find new ways to cope. Example: Smokers who use cigarettes to relax following a rough work day often look to tobacco as a form of stress-management. As tensions will often escalate once the coping mechanism is removed, experts suggest that recovering addicts engage in routine exercise and proper diet to compensate. Additional options include yoga, the arts, and meditation. Try experimenting with some new activities and dive in to something that really gets your motor revving.

Keep in Mind:

–          Just because you’re tempted to use again, does not mean you have to

–          Avoid self-criticism – Stay optimistic!

–          If you do relapse, don’t let it consume you. Get. That. Dirt off your shoulder – focus – and get back in the game.

Alcoholism and Powerlessness

There has always been a lot of confusion about this matter of asserting the will. When the twelve steps say “we admitted we were powerless over alcohol” we assert what has always been a fact about that malady. Namely that a frontal attack by the will on the desire to drink almost never works. This hard fact is the premise upon which we must start. The recognition that actual lunacy cannot be subdued by straight will power. God knows drunks have tried hard enough to do just this and have generally failed. Nobody would expect much result were every kleptomaniac to take the pledge not to steal. Repeating stealing, the kleptomaniac is as compulsively nutty as he can be. Though this compulsive condition is not so generally recognized in the alcoholic, because drinking is socially acceptable, it is never the less true that he is just about as crazy. Therefore our first is realistic when it declares that we are powerless to deal with the alcohol hex on our own resources or will.-pg. 273 from The Language Of The Heart

It is clear that we cannot get sober on our own or by willpower alone. If we could the majority of alcoholics in this world would probably opt for getting sober that way resulting in a huge number of success stories regarding sobriety. However the fact is that willpower or our wills have nothing to do with it. It wasn’t because we were weak willed that we could not stop drinking or could not rise above this seemingly hopeless state of mind and body that we suffered from. In fact, our will if anything kept us drinking and using longer. Therefore no matter how strong or weak our will and mind was we surely could not recover using the same tools we used to get loaded. We could not fix the problem with the problem. Instead what we needed to do was ask for alcohol addiction help and work a program. Some of us might have even needed extra help through places such as a drug addiction detox, AA, or 30 day rehab program. Again needing these places in order to recover is not a matter of being weak willed. There are positive ways to incorporate our wills into our lives as well as negative ways. When we look at different ways to stay sober we are using our willpower to the best of our ability. We pray and meditate so that our will is aligned with our higher powers will for us. It is then and only then that we can be freed from the bondage of self.

A Life of Sobriety, Acceptance, and Peace

“One way to get at the meaning of the principle of acceptance is to meditate upon it in the context of AA’s much used prayer ‘God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.’ Essentially this is to ask for the resources of grace by which we may make spiritual progress under all conditions. Greatly emphasized in this wonderful prayer is a need for the kind of wisdom that discriminates between the possible and the impossible. We shall also see that life’s formidable array of pains and problems will require many different degrees of acceptance as we try to apply this valued principle.-pg. 269 from The Language Of The Heart

Acceptance is defined as the act of taking or receiving something offered, as well as the act of believing. It sounds good in theory but it is one of those things that are easier said than done. On one hand we might feel as alcoholics that acceptance is something we aren’t very good at but if we look back at the time when we had asked for alcohol addiction help were we not somewhat living in acceptance? Did we not accept that we had a problem and that we needed help? Were we not beaten down enough to accept that we might need to go to a 30 day rehab program, AA, or a drug addiction detox? If you are sober the answer to these questions are most likely yes. On the other hand there have most likely been times when we have found some person place or thing completely unacceptable to us. In those situations we ask for our higher powers guidance on what his/her will for us is and the power to carry that out. Through this kind of prayer and meditation not only are we relying on our higher power to carry us through but we are getting closer to living a life full of acceptance and peace.

Fear and Seeking Alcohol Addiction Help

As the AA book says “Fear is an evil, corroding thread; the fabric of our lives is shot through with it.” Fear is obviously a bar to reason, and to love, and of course it invariably powers anger, vainglory, and aggression. It underlies maudlin guilt and paralyzing depression. President Roosevelt once made the significant remark that “we have nothing to fear but fear itself.”- pg. 265 from The Language of the Heart

When we are first getting sober or even before we receive alcohol addiction help we are often times full of fear surrounding many different aspects of sobriety. Some of us may be fearful of the idea of getting sober while others may be afraid of the process whether it involves a 30 day rehab program, AA, or a drug addiction detox. The thing about fear is that while it may protect us from potentially dangerous positions it can also keep us from positive things and situations in our life as well. Fear can be healthy if it aids in keeping you out of harm’s way. For example when we first get sober some of us may decide not to go into bars for a while…this is an example of a healthy fear of alcohol. However If our fears keep us from doing things like getting sober then it is an unhealthy and destructive fear. The fact is that we didn’t get sober to live in fear. Sure it’s going to crop up from time to time and that’s fine. What matters most aren’t so much the feelings surrounding the situations in your life but rather what you do with those feelings.

Maintaining A Sober Social Life

Social events offer people a wonderful way to cut loose, have fun, and interact with others. Unfortunately, many of these events often involve, or even revolve around alcohol consumption. If you, a friend, or date are the sober ones in the crowd, your stance may potentially prove difficult to maintain. Fortunately, our drug rehab counselors have some tips up their sleeve…

Communicate!

Ask your friends for support. Communicate your commitment to maintaining your sobriety, and request they respect your decision. Though you may miss out on some wacky stories, you’ll also avoid placing yourself in an awkward and potentially hazardous situation. Bring the topic up on your own before making plans rather than letting yourself become resentful.

Fun!

Make your own plans and ask others to join in! Take the leader role, and suggest something casual and fun like a play, coffee, or a movie outing. This way, you will avoid being pestered into visiting a location where drinking is the main focus.When a get-together places an emphasis on drinking, attention is ultimately placed on what you can’t have. As such, it can be easy to become moody, withdrawn, and even angry at the party you are associating with. It’s a lose-lose situation, which can easily be avoided with proper planning and forward communication.

Find Tasty Non-Alcoholic Beverages

Throw your own party centered around non-alcoholic beverages. Stock your bar with an assortment of juices, waters, smoothies, etc, and ask your friends to contribute to the pot. If you have friends who still enjoy a drink every now and again (and most of us do), do your best to avoid placing the focus on booze. Offer a cocktail hour that includes karaoke, poker, video games, movies or Pictionary. The options are virtually endless

Be Smart

Avoid placing yourself in situations that you know will be tempting. Meeting your friend for a glass a wine is a far cry from a full-blown backyard kegger. Use your intuition and ask yourself whether you’d be comfortable maintaining a sober mindset throughout the occasion.

Laugh!

If you happen to be caught in an alcohol fixation occasion, such as a wedding or family reunion, you’ll need to warp your thinking. Though drinking may be a large part of the event, there are ways to avoid relapse while taking focus off of your sobriety. Dance, talk, socialize and enjoy! Boredom and insecurity are by far two of the biggest reasons people utilize alcohol in social situations. By taking matters into your own hands, the power to enjoy is your own. Plus… there’s certain to be plenty of drunken entertainment to help validate your decision throughout the evening J

Need Help?

If you’re struggling with alcoholism, our addiction specialists are on-hand to answer and address your concerns. Call our rehab center in Los Angeles, CA today, and get on track towards the healthy, happy and sober lifestyle you deserve!

Trust God, Clean House, Work With Others: A Formula for Sobriety, Part 3

Trust in god, clean house, and work with others.

That is the basic formula for sobriety. Over the next few days we are going to break down each part and see what there is to look forward to after receiving alcohol addiction help starting with trusting in God…

This may seem like a difficult thing to do as many of us might have a skewed concept of a higher power. We may find ourselves having thoughts such as If God did exist why was I alone when I needed him, or her the most?, Why do I have a disease that makes it so I can’t stay sober and need to go to a drug addiction detox? Why didn’t God answer my prayers if he exists? , or I don’t need god when I have a 30 day rehab program or another 12 step program I attend. While these are valid feelings, and thoughts to have the fact is that God answers prayers in many ways and not always by saying yes. We get to come up with our own concept of a higher power. Each one uniquely different and hopefully a source of light and love versus any negative concept we might have had previously. If we do the work we can begin to see hopefully that our higher power has our lives planned out for us, nothing is really an accident, we are taken care of, and nobody knows our path better than our higher power. It says in the big book of alcoholics anonymous that “faith without works is dead. “That means this is a process and we need to continue working not only on our faith but on our ever changing and growing concept of a higher power as well.

Trust God, Clean House, Work With Others: A Formula for Sobriety, Part 2

Cleaning house goes hand in hand with trusting God. Faith is an invaluable asset when it comes to cleaning house…what does that mean? Well prior to receiving alcohol addiction help we most likely caused a large amount of damage as well as acquired a huge amount of resentment towards ourselves and others. When we get to a drug addiction detox, AA, or a 30 day rehab program we get the opportunity to right what was once wrong by “cleaning house”. We do this by taking a thorough inventory of ourselves. We write down on paper the people we feel have harmed or wronged us, what happened, what it affected, and most importantly our part in it. We then get to make a list of people we had harmed and make amends for our behavior. We do this because not only do we want to be rid of the guilt that had plagued many of us before getting sober but also it holds us accountable. As mentioned before we get self esteem by estimable acts. It also states clearly in the big book of alcoholics anonymous that if our actions continue to harm others, we are not remorseful, and continue that behavior then we will surely drink. For us drinking is a death sentence. So cleaning up our side of the street isn’t just about the people we have harmed but it is directly related to us being able to achieve sobriety and the quality of our sobriety as well. When we clean house we are opening ourselves up to long lasting sobriety, peace, love, surrender, and many other amazing possibilities.

Trust God, Clean House, Work With Others: A Formula for Sobriety, Part 1

Working with others…This is perhaps the easiest and most fulfilling out of the three. After receiving alcohol addiction help, we then do the work either through a 30 day rehab program, AA, or a drug addiction detox, then comes the working with others part. There are many ways other than sponsorship to be of service. There are commitments at meetings, committees to volunteer for, as well as different areas of program that need help. With that being said sponsorship is one of the most rewarding as well as imperative parts to staying sober. Through sponsorship we get to give away what was so freely given to us. After we have started doing the work we can then take others through the steps and show newcomers precisely how we have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. If we can look back to when we were new and can recall the fear and discomfort that we experienced then hopefully we can approach this situation with patience, love, tolerance, and compassion. We get to walk through this together. Taking someone through the steps is important not only is it the thing that keeps the program going but it also teaches us how to show up, be accountable , work with our fellows ,keep our egos in check, and keeps us sober. There is nothing more rewarding then seeing someone you sponsor stay sober, know that you helped them achieve sobriety, and perhaps passed on some of the most valuable tools in life one can pass on.

“Do You Miss Drinking?”

It seems like a normal drinker’s favorite question to ask is “do you miss drinking”? The fact is prior to receiving alcohol addiction help, going to AA meetings and getting sober through the help of places such as a drug addiction detox, or 30 day rehab program for most of us the way we were living life was no longer working for us. Sure drinking was probably fun in the beginning but what we were doing prior to getting sober was not living but rather maintaining. We had to drink and we lost our power of choice. It became our “medicine.” So when asked do you miss drinking the first thought that usually comes to mind is what is there to miss? When alcoholics hit bottom it is usually after we have become enslaved to our addiction we are stuck in the bondage of self and it is definitely not anything worth missing. When we get cravings or find that we are missing getting loaded it is usually a result of the part of our brain being triggered that has poor memory recall. Normal drinkers would recoil from alcohol like a hot flame if they ever came close to experiencing what   we had prior to getting sober but not us. We seem to touch the “flame” and two minutes later we forget that once again alcohol had burned us and were back at it. We do this over and over again until we can no longer endure the torture. When we get sober we trade our previous life for a life of freedom, happiness, and joy when we do the work. It is life that is worth living and worth giving up our old ones for.